We'll get back to ya !

I had a job interview yesterday, first one in about five months. I think it went really well -- I'm even fairly sure I'll get a call back for the second round of interviews....BUT: instead of continuing the interview with some conventional chatting and/or talking with more of the company folk, they said they have some "tests" that they want to run by the people who get picked. Since the whole interview was very chilled and almost like having a relaxed conversation with people you've known for a long time (yeah, love those interviews !), I asked them what kind of tests they mean... Dude said creative tests. Like you have to come up with some text (in English) about the products and/or prepare your own base form for a quotation or something....Hmm.

I have no problem with text, I have no problem with English...but I'm worried about the word TEST.......because....

...I suck at tests !

I swear, I totally freeze in test situations. I think it's because when I was in elementary school and I was really bad at math (which continued long after elementary school) (who am I kidding, it is still continuing), I also happened to have one nasty piece of work as a match teacher. This guy was ruthless; you'd have to go in front of the class to the blackboard and try to solve calculations that he would bark at you. He was shouting at you if you didn't know how to proceed...and I stood there several times, totally frozen, with absolutely zero intelligent thoughts in my head, just praying that I would die. He was relentless, the kind of person who should never been allowed to be a teacher. My stomach was in knots for whole days when I knew we'd have math....and I never improved because my fear clouded my ability to think straight. Well, at least that's what I tell myself.

After that experience I have never been comfortable, in all my life, even playing something as mundane as board games with friends or something where I'll potentially put myself in the "dangerous" position of being humiliated before other people. I don't mind, say,  speaking to an audience, and I am generally a confident person when it comes to interviews and socializing...but I think that even today if I someone dragged me to a blackboard and ask me so what's two plus two -- tell me NOW... I would probably stutter s-s-s-i-x and start crying, haha. The same way, even though I'm quite confident that my IQ is at least average if not slightly above....I'd never want it tested because I would totally flunk the test just because....it's a test. 

So....I'm kinda nervously expecting a call for my second interview....and even though I don't usually get nervous before an interview (I actually quite enjoy them often - maybe I'm a narcissist), this time around I'll be probably s*itting my pants fearing the tests I'm going to be put through. Yikes.